i cannot control anyone

what can we REALLY control? 

that's the question of the week for me. 

there are so many things i like to think i control in my life, but in reality, the scope of what i can manage or control is very limited.

 

i have a situation in my life right now where an individual i love and is close to me, keeps saying some harsh things. i have had to really separate what i can and cannot control. {graphic below}

and the only thing that is truly in my control, is me. 

and i'm still working on realizing that. 

when someone hurts me, i can't control that.

but i can control how i spend my time. and if that individual is toxic, i will leave. i don't have to be the victim after the first offense. 

in this drama triangle {below}, victim puts all the blame on everyone else; the villain tries to control everyone; and the hero attempts to control the victim. 

so i'm doing as elsa, and letting things go. when i'm faced with a conflict or argument or trial, i now list out what i cannot control. it helps take so much anxiety off my chest and help keep me grounded.